**This blog was originally created in 2010 to document my husband and my life as we tried to get pregnant with our first child. After finding BDSM I repurposed the blog in 2014 to look at our kink and balancing it with the two children we now have. Please feel free to read the below posts and any from my 2010 and 2011 archive, but please be aware that they are not representative of our life now. Also, certain edits have been made to these posts. To start from the beginning of our kinky life, start here. **
A girl I went to high school with lost her mother this weekend. She was a lovely woman who supported her daughters in everything and could not have been a nicer human being. It’s weird to find out about her death on facebook, but it was amazing to see information fly. She was only 48. My mother is 52. The shock of losing someone so young and so quickly. After my father’s heart infection last thanksgiving, it hit really hard how fleeting life can be. It was great to see my parents this weekend. I do not appreciate it as much as I should. And thinking how terrible this must be for her girls to travel home for such a tragedy is heart breaking.
One of my goals for this year “of the baby” is to get a grasp on my family. Some of the family relationships have struggled in the past. I would hate to lose those ties as D and I start our own family. We want our children to appreciate the support system that a family can provide. D’s family is quite small, especially compared to my own. And even the parts of his mother’s side which is large, he does not know or speak to them. My family vacations with my cousins, aunts, grandparents, was a large part of my upbringing and I would love to share that with my own children. And if that passing of a wonderful 48 year-old woman can have any blessing, it will be to teach myself and others to savor the moment with loved ones.