Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

What I Wish I Could Say…

It frustrates me when we have a ‘fight’ about an issue I am having and I end up talking you off the ledge. But you never really act on anything that I say. You always sound surprised when I bring up an issue, but they are always the same issues.
I was trying to talk to you last night about feeling sexy, then you make it about me not cuddling with you at night. You say how much you need me, but I don’t feel it. I asked you to show me. And you just went off on how you thought I was going to kill myself. I know you need time, I’m not expecting a quick change, but this isn’t a new request.
I know you need to work. I would appreciate it if you would learn not to promise me things. I know you never say “I promise”, but you raise my expectations as if you did. It just hurts, because it made me feel like after all we talked about last night, I wasn’t a priority. You create all this stress and guilt for yourself, then you get upset when I’m not happy.
I want to be happy. I know that I need to do what I can to dial back my sexual frustrations. It’s not fair to you to keep throwing that at you. But you need to remember how easily I get turned on, so when you text me dirty things and encourage me to look at porn, you are making things worse. Especially when you aren’t in the mood.
I’m sorry that I am not always happy. I get really worked up during the day by the kids and when you get home it takes me awhile to sink into just you. I want to be everything that you want. But I want to be appreciated, even when I’m not perfect. And you never tell me I’m enough. You say that you need me, but only when under pressure and in an argument. I would never leave because I thought I was better than you, or that I could do better. But if I thought that you wanted me to go, that I was making you unhappy, why would I stay. You always talk about how you are afraid that I will leave, but what do you do to show me you want me to stay?


Allowed tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>