Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Not Enough Coffee

This new job schedule is harder than I thought. The last time Sir had to work like this, I had a job and was able to keep myself busy. I don’t remember feeling this alone last time. And I know it will only last a few more weeks. But when you are already in a bad place, little things seem like explosions.

I need a stiff drink. I used to to go a week or more without an orgasm in my vanilla life. Now 24 hours feels like a massive dry spell. And everything makes you tingle. I used to be fine going days without any intimate contact. I could stay busy. Hell, coffee and a book and I could stay relaxed and be fine. Now all the coffee in the world can’t keep my stress in check. I’ve had to stop reading my smut books (especially the good BDSM ones). I’ve been trying everything I can to avoid getting worked up. Sir is under so much stress with this job. When he’s home he is either working or stressing about how he should be working. Today he came down from his office for lunch and dinner. Hopefully he will take another break before we have to put the kids to bed.

I might get a quick squeeze before his head hits the pillow, but that is almost worse. After he riles me up it takes me forever to calm down enough to fall asleep. And I can’t play with myself for relief. If it was purposeful, he would be mean, but it’s not. I know he wants to play, so I can’t be mad, or even frustrated at him.

However, needless to say, I will be much happier and much calmer when this stint with work is over at the end of February. Maybe I need to start spiking my coffee.

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