Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Too Damn Cold….

It’s -7 outside. That’s without windchill. The dog has never peed so fast.

I’m supposed to go to the dentist this afternoon, but even with my big mom car I’m worried about the roads. At least I don’t have to take the kids out. The boy is going through an ‘I don’t need to wear a coat’ phase, so that’s nice.

Last night was my first Wednesday orgasm of the new year. Not sure how I feel about them. I think we both felt like it was a little forced, on both sides. Having the baby up screaming until past midnight did not help. Hopefully coffee may bring on some open conversation about it later.

I’m struggling with letting Sir know what I am feeling. With all the stress in our lives right now, I’m just looking for some grounding and it’s hard to squeeze that in around everything. It is a lot harder to clarify my wants and needs than I thought. I’m still getting past all the shame and guilt that was ingrained in me regarding sex. It feels wrong to explain that I want my hair pulled and I want finger bruise marks where he grabs my hip during a fuck. I love it when he talks dirty and plays with my nipples until they hurt. But writing it down for you, gentle reader, seems easy. Saying it out loud to Sir (though I know he wouldn’t judge me) makes it real and scary. I’ll grow out of it, hopefully soon. Sexual awakening and all that.

Hope everyone is warm and cozy whatever they are.

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One Response to “Too Damn Cold….”

  • abby

    Saying …voicing…our wants, our little secrets is difficult for all of us. Master has been working for a long time to get me to be open and vocal. The good news i am getting better at it….but it is not easy. Be good to yourself you will get there.
    hugs abby

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