Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Healthy Start

I have been talking to Sir about getting healthy for awhile. My mother has been dieting and adding exercise to her life for the last year. She has lost over 50 lbs. (even with all the chips and pints in England). She looks amazing. The thinest and most energetic I’ve ever seen her. Since they got home last week it’s been a huge motivator in getting me thinking about changes.

Also, one of my cousin’s friends passed away suddenly last December. He had a heart attack. He was in his mid-thirties. I know he wasn’t taking care of himself. He drank a lot, smoked a lot, more than dabbled in drugs. But even though I don’t live in those sorts of extremes, it was still a wake up call. My kids need a mom who is going to be around for a lot longer than that. And, now that Sir and I have found ourselves in this new D/s dynamic, I intend to enjoy it for as long as possible.

I will admit, since our sex life has ramped up there is a lot more naked me time. And, since Baby 2.0, my body doesn’t resemble the tiny dancer frame I once had. It’s hard to feel sexy when buying XL underwear. Sir thinks my stretch marks from the kids have character; I think he’s just jealous that they have left larger, more permanent marks on me than he has. Even so, losing some significant weight would help me feel sexier for him. I need to increase my activity and lower my caloric intake. Between keeping up with the kids and having enough energy at the end of the day to preform my slave duties for Sir, coffee isn’t going to get the job done.

It’s hard when you are an emotional eater. When I get upset or stressed, I just want junk. Especially junk that I don’t have to cook. I’ve gotten better, and working on my depression has helped. But I also need to work to correct the damage that has already been done.

So, over the weekend Sir took me out and bought me a fitness tracker. Looking through all the options, we settled on the Jawbone U2, but there are several choices depending on what features you want. Sir has been really supportive. He’s never called me fat, or complained about my weight changing with the depression or the kids. Every time that I have tried to start a work out or a diet, he has been right behind me. This will be no different, except it will be successful.

He’s going to work with me to set goals and incorporate them into my tasks and rules. This tracker has motivation tips too. Including yelling at me right now because I’ve been sitting at my desk too long. Great, now I have a machine telling me what to do too.

Maybe I didn’t think this through.

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