I wanted to take some time to discuss with you all a problem that I have been having with bondage from nearly the first time that we tried it. It’s there in the Title; The Panties Problem.
If you also have this problem – and especially if you’ve overcome it – then you might know that the panties aren’t the problem. The problem is in not being experienced enough to know how to think through a complex, multi-stage exercise in advance, so as to spot and address potential problems before they happen.
For me, this lack of experience most often manifests itself as the pair of underwear that I see right when my dick is getting hard, that I forgot to tell Rye to take off before I tied her legs to six different pieces of furniture using a comically vast collection of short pieces of rope and belts.
On more than one occasion, this realization has triggered a barrage of self-directed anger and profanities. A couple of times (very early on) Rye would say something like, “I wondered when you’d notice,” or, “I didn’t say anything because I thought you had a plan.”
These statements were never – ever – meet with a well reasoned and rational response from me.
But I am getting better. The experience problem has become a personal challenge. I just want to be better all around. I am driven to push back my formidable amateur status with real trial and error.
So imagine Rye’s surprise when I tied her up tonight and intentionally left the underwear on ! I told her, “Don’t worry. I have a plan.”
“OH good,” she said, “because I didn’t know if I should have said something.”
“Always say something,” I said. “Don’t presume that time has rid us of all our misadventures.”
The plan was, you see, to put her on the bed, tie her up, place the Doxy inside her panties, and just let it go. If I got to the point where I needed to avail myself of that sweet, tied up slut, a pair of safety scissors sat at the ready.
That didn’t happen because after only one long orgasm, her butt muscles went full Charlie horse and we switched to another, more cock-sucky enterprise.
I didn’t foresee any of the problems that came out tonight, but we dealt with them.
* * *
I think this ‘problem’ is just one of many that we deal with. This one happens to be hilarious (in my opinion, I’m sure Sir doesn’t think so). But there is a lot of trial and error that has to happen as we both get more comfortable in our D/s roles and play. We can’t start out being perfect all the time just because I’ve read a bunch of erotica novels and we both watch porn.
I think one of the things that has really helped us is the ability to be flexible. Like last night, my muscles weren’t really up for his ‘plan’ so he changed it. We still had a great time (I mean, his cock got sucked, he’s not complaining) even if it wasn’t the original, planned out scene he has envisioned.
So moral of the bondage story is to be willing to go with the flow and don’t get hung up on being perfect all the time. Sir is more than perfect enough for me. Even when I laugh at him for roping me to the bed and then realizing he wanted me on my back. Though through personal experience I will say that laughing will get you into a lot of trouble.