Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Shocked Face

This greeted me when I opened up my email yesterday:

Good morning,

Please let me apologize for my rude mouth yesterday with boob comment – it jumped out with absolutely NO filter and was quite rude. I am very sorry for that.
Then as I thought more about it it was my worst nightmare – I was channeling my mother!
Again, I am very sorry.
Have a terrific Friday.
I was shocked. Literally, jaw dropping shock. The shirt I was wearing was a blank tank top. I had some pretty serious cleavage, I’ll admit, but I was wearing a cardigan. I do try to keep it professional while at work, but boobs are boobs. Layers work best as the temperature in my office fluctuates a lot. But it’s not like my nipples were popping out. If they had been I’m sure I would’ve gotten a more stern comment about my nipple piercings.
My mom wasn’t necessarily a slut shamer growing up, but she did have her moments. I was pretty restricted in how much skin I was allowed to show. There were several words often used; I think hoochie was my favorite. Shirts that she deemed too skimpy or too tight were spirited away. I would put a shirt in the laundry and never see it again. Comments were often made about other women and their choice of clothing. I think she always thought that the way that I dressed somehow reflected on her as a mother. While I understand the logic in that to a certain extent, it was certainly frustrating to grasp as a teen.
I know I am making my mom out to be horrible. She’s not. She is a product of her own mothers restrictions and insecurities. So imagine my true astonishment at her apology. Sir and I aren’t really open to our extended families about our BDSM, open-status, or this blog. Still, she has been much better over the last few years in accepting me and doing her best to understand my depression. Especially since my cousin attempted suicide early this year, mom has really be supportive.
Anyway, it was just really nice (if a bit odd) to read this apology. As I often feel that my enthusiasm for sex and feeling sexy is seen as a bad thing in our society, it was a wonderful vote of confidence from someone I greatly respect. Some day I hope, if she knows about everything that is important in my life, she will still be this supportive.

2 Responses to “Shocked Face”

  • Jack (and Jill)

    I can relate to this. While it’s obviously different being a guy, i.e. less chance of being slut-shamed, I still feel like my own sexuality would be viewed negatively by society at large. Thus, when I told my mom we were open (specifically because you were coming for a visit and we needed her to watch our daughter off-site), it was very validating to see how accepting and supportive she was.

    • Rye

      I am so glad she was. It’s nice that you can be honest with her about it.


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