Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Poly Problem #53: Sharing Porn

Because Jack and I live quite a distance apart, we generally chat on twitter or via text. We talk mostly about our families and how much we want to be fucking each other at that moment. Jokes and kid’s quotes get shared for the other to read when the other wakes up. The time change, while annoying, is manageable as we both put in the effort. As with any long-distance relationship, it takes work.

We also share a lot of photos. Most are selfies, taken during our conversations to depict a certain mood or response. I’ll admit to sending quite a few boob pics and if I think my hair looks particularly good that day I’ll see if he agrees. Basically our relationship is a bit of a teenage romance for me. Except with a lot more dirty talk and mutual masturbation. So, nothing teenage about it. And I’m sure it depends on how you define romance. I’m a beer and burgers with a B movie kind of girl rather than a wine and escargot with opera.*

There are also a number of nudes and dick pics. I don’t want to say how many, we’ll go with a lot. Some videos too. Many saved on my phone for occasions when I need a little help (not help doing dishes, if that’s not obvious). I still maintain, hearing him moan my name as he cums is the hottest thing. Which is my not so subtle segway into today’s Poly Problem – Sharing porn.

Jack and I were chatting the other day, as we often do. Conversation turned to sexy things that he’d like to do to me (one of my favorite topics). A steamy photo or two were exchanged and I asked him if I could have another video. I have a thing about watching him jerk off. He will send me a video from time to time, often with a good moan of my name included. I have a great one from when he was here in December on loop right now. Getting a new one is always a gooey present. This time he had an interesting response:

“Sure I can send you one. It doesn’t have any names in it as I sent it to Jill earlier. Does that bother you?”

I said it didn’t bother me and he sent the video over. I enjoyed it and didn’t give it another thought until later that night. Getting ready for bed I pulled the video back up. I thought about the fact that he had made it for Jill. That he had sent it to her first. I felt like I should be upset, but I couldn’t pin point why. I mean, I would love to have Jack all to myself for an extended period. But at the same time, I respect that we have separate lives.

I would be lying if I said that knowing that Jack sent the same photos to me that he sent to every other woman he talks to doesn’t bother me. There are times when I want something to be just for me. To have a piece of him that I don’t have to share. I’m hoping that’s normal. But does it bother me if I get a video/photo/etc. that someone else has seen? It certainly didn’t make it any less hot. And it’s not like I haven’t sent him a photo that I had previously posted on twitter or on here.

Is there an expectation with all things intimate that they be exclusive to the recipient? This falls back to one of my previous posts about thinking about someone else when you are having sex. Does that apply to masturbation as well? If you shoot a video or photo of an erection that you got while thinking about someone other than who you send it to, is it less sexy? ¬†I don’t think so, but I guess I could see how some people would think so. The rabbit hole on this can get deep very quickly.

I think maybe this is something to be sorted out with your partners on a case by case basis. Depending on how many people you play/flirt with, it may not be an issue. But to ensure that everyone feels special and appreciated when they are with you, it would be something to be up front about. I’m pretty relaxed about it, but I’m not sure I’d be thrilled to get a video with Jack moaning someone else’s name. Though, honestly, I would probably just mute it and grab my Doxy. Hey, when you find something that works for you, you don’t ask why.

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*Though as a completely random note, I love The Pirates of Penzance. I can be classy…sometimes.

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4 Responses to “Poly Problem #53: Sharing Porn”

  • Kayla Lords

    You bring up good questions – how important is it to have something of your own, some special part of the other person, even if you have to share? In my own (extremely limited) experience, I’ve found that things sometimes bother me because I think they’re “supposed” to bother me. Weird.

  • Mrs Fever

    I am pretty big on exclusivity. I’ve been straight up about it with my partners too. IF I permit dick pics (I’m not a big fan), there is a clear up-front expectation set: If he’s just hard? I don’t care. I don’t want to see it. And unless it’s just a throw-away “I’m horny” type comment, I don’t even want to hear about it.

    On the other hand…

    If he’s hard FOR ME, or horny BECAUSE OF ME, or is thinking of me / calling my name when he strokes his cock? That’s a different story. THAT, I like. (Again, provided that I’ve given him permission to send me that kind of content.)

    • Rye

      I agree. There is certainly a big difference in those situations. And hard ‘for me’ is amazingly hot ūüôā

  • Jack (and Jill)

    That reminds me. I was supposed to get you a video the other night, but was interrupted before I could. I need to fix that ASAP.

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