Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

The Wonderful World of Ifs

if

If this, if that…

1. If you were forced to wear a warning label, what would yours say?

Once you wind her up; she won’t stop.
2. If you were a Sesame Street character, which one would you be?

Slimey the worm.
3. If you could have an endless supply of a candy or baked good, what would you get?

Mint Milanos if we are going non-homemade. Probably my dad’s cheesecake if we sticking to the homemade category.
4. Who is your favorite villain? Why? 

Alan Rickman’s Sheriff of Nottingham from Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. Anyone who would cut your heart out with a spoon is my evil hero.
5. Are you more in tune with sunrise, daytime, sunset or nighttime?

As a morning person I guess I would say sunrise. Really, any time I can have coffee. I used to be much better at mornings before I had kids. But I guess I would still say I’m better in the mornings than any other time. I’m a pretty cranky person generally is what I am trying to say.

Bonus: If you took a job out of your current career path, what job would you take?

Well, my paid career path is in government. My aspirational career path is writing. If both of those are off the table I would love to be someone’s assistant. Plan and organize their life. I would be great at that. And I think it would fill a submissive need.

TMI Tuesday: Love, Emotion, Trust

love emotion trust

tmi_nov29

1. What would you do to leave a great impression with a person on your first date?

I’m pretty shy until I get to know someone, but generally on dates I try to be funny. I’m sure I don’t always succeed.

2. Do you usually follow your heart or your head?

My heart. Nearly always. And it’s usually not a good outcome. I think that following my heart usually means that I act impulsively. And, as this blog pretty clearly shows, it doesn’t often work out.

3. If your significant other told you to jump off a tall cliff and told you that you’ll land safely because there’s a net you can’t see yet, would you blindly trust your s.o. and jump?

Can I call bullshit on this one? I don’t really think Sir would ever ask/tell me jump off a cliff. And I’m not sure I would jump, even if he did. I don’t think it has anything to do with trust though. If it has something to do with the safety of the kids, then maybe. But honestly, I’m not for high intensity activities (sex doesn’t count).

4. How do you support your significant other?

Support is such a broad word. I work full-time and my job gives the family insurance. I try to clean and keep the kids from driving us both crazy. I hope I support him emotionally as much as he wants. We both have depression, so I think we both struggle sometimes to give/ask for the emotional support that we need. But I hope I do an okay job.

5. What types of things or gestures/acts make you feel loved?

When people really listen to me. When someone buys me a gift that they actually thought about. I love just spending time with someone. Playing games, watching a movie. I might also be a cuddle slut.

6. What types of things or gestures/acts make you feel respected?

I feel respected at work when someone asks my opinion of something or asks me how to do something. Having my opinion and/or knowledge respected is big for me. I always appreciate a little credit too. I don’t really enjoy being the center of attention, but if I put a lot of work into a project and a boss or supervisor recognizes that effort I feel respected.

7. Can you have emotional intimacy without physical intimacy? Explain.

Yes. Speaking from my current place of having a partner with no sex drive to speak of, we still have a strong emotional connection. We’ve been together for ten years and we’ve had periods without physical intimacy before. We’ll get over this hurdle too, we always do.

Interestingly, for me, it’s the other way around. If I don’t have emotional intimacy it is very difficult for me to have positive physical intimacy. In my experience I cannot relax, I never orgasm, and I usually feel terrible afterwards.

Bonus:  In 2016, what was your most conflicted emotional moment?

Realizing that my connection with Jack was stronger than I had considered. This is important in it’s own right and I don’t want to down play it. But it is more the larger significance of learning that I could care about more than one person. That my love for Sir didn’t diminish. That I cared about him just as much, or more, because I also cared about someone else. My emerging understanding of how polyamory has manifested itself for me. I’m still not sure how it will grow and change as Sir and I get more (or less) comfortable with the idea. But I really love the idea that this could be something amazing.

————

tmi-tuesday-blog-wordpress-button-small

TMI Tuesday: Misc.

TMI Tuesday: August 16, 2016

Step right up! Get your TMI Tuesday here.

1. Where is the most beautiful place on earth and why?

For me, the highlands of Scotland. No question. Beautiful in any weather during any time of day. Every photo I have of the landscapes and castles are stunning.

2. How old is the most expired item in your fridge?

March 2016

3. What’s under your bed?

Shoes, a stash of sex towels (for easy reach), probably some dirty socks

4. What is in your pocket?

Nothing, I don’t use my pockets.

5. Which famous person would you like to be best-friends with? Why?

J.K. Rowling. Multiple reasons. Scotland is an obvious connection point. Her writing skill is another. I think she’s funny, strong, and politically like-minded to me. And I think she might be a tad kinky 🙂

6. There is now a line of lacy lingerie for men. Would you wear it or like to see your man in it? See here and here

Why not? I can’t imagine Sir would go for it, but it might be nice to see him in it once or twice for fun.

Bonus: Think The Olympics. Men’s gymnastic uniforms–sexy or goofy? Discuss!

gym_men_tmi

The tops aren’t bad. The stirrup pants are a bit goofy though. At least the socks match. Just think of how bad they would be if they were a contrasting color. They don’t look any less manly than the outfits that figure skaters wear. And I guess you want something that doesn’t affect your balance or drag while you are spinning. Or anything that would catch on your skin or equipment.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link totmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

tmi-tuesday-blog-wordpress-button-small

TMI Tuesday: Guilty Pleasures

tmi_guilty_pleasure

1. What TV show do you love to watch but are a little embarrassed to tell friends that you simply cannot miss an episode?

Hoarders. I love watching it. I don’t know if it makes me feel like we have our shit together or just redefines a messy house. But I will actually re-watch old episodes while I work and think nothing of it.

2. What website and/or magazine do you read and it’s your guilty pleasure?

Do romance novels count? I moved more boxes of those to the new house than I care to admit. I read a lot of sex blogs, but I don’t really feel guilty about that. The only problem is when I get caught up and lose and hour or two of work time.

3. What is the grocery store item you buy but you know you should not?

This has really become a problem with the diet. Everything bagels should really be left on the shelf with all the carbs. But my Achilles heel is cheese. Specifically blue cheese. There is nothing more luscious to me than a creamy, rich cheese.

4. Tell us about something you do at work that you would not want your co-workers to know that you do.

Luckily I currently work from home, so my afternoon masturbation sessions don’t bother anyone but the dog. But I am currently looking for work outside the home (I actually have an interview this morning!). So eventually I will have to wear clothes after I drop off the boys. Maybe my twitter flirting and sexting to Sir will have to be reduced at a ‘real’ job. Maybe.

5. Do you have a secret stash? What is it?

I used to have a secret stash of chocolate before I started my diet. Lately I’ve been trying to keep from buying anything that I would stockpile. What is terrible is now that I’m on a diet I have started stashing food for Sir and the boys. The kids have snacks and Sir has lots of things to take to work with him to munch on at the office.

Bonus: What is your most embarrassing guilty pleasure?

Embarrassing has really be redefined for me since having kids and getting into BDSM. I really love masturbating in front of Sir. I usually only feel embarrassed until I relax into it and then I don’t care who is watching. Which apparently is why Sir has started shooting video to send to a friend of ours. Reviews have been very positive and the embarrassment has faded.

So maybe ranch dressing should be my worst guilty pleasure. Sir has often offered to cover his cock in it as he is pretty sure I would give him the best blow job ever. Can’t argue with results. 🙂

tmi-tuesday-blog-wordpress-button-small

TMI Tuesday: Let’s Get Personal

1. Toilet paper. How do you hang your toilet paper? The end coming over the top or with the end coming from around the back and at the bottom?

I go with the end coming over the top. However, this has recently become a problem as the baby has found this to be a great new toy. He spins the roll until it’s a pile on the floor. Though, I guess he would probably so that no matter how I put the roll on.
2. Towels. Do you use a new one each time you bathe or reuse?

When I was growing up I used a new one each time, but now that I am the one doing laundry I reuse. I probably use a towel two or three days and then wash it. Sir does the same. Surprisingly, towels that I use to clean my body I am willing to use multiple times, but sex towels are only a one time use. The shower towels are probably still cleaner.
3. Bathing. Do you use a washcloth to clean your body or use the soap directly all over your body with no washcloth?

Direct soap. I think occasionally I will buy body wash, or it is given as a gift. With body wash I tend to use a washcloth or luffa, otherwise I will use too much. But bar soap is a direct approach.
4. Bra. Do you remove your bra by taking your arms out of the straps first, then inching it around your body until you can reach the clasp and undo it or do you contort your arms, and reach around and unclasp.

I’ve never really been able to do the clasp and turn thing. I’ve always clasped it in the back. And I put it on and take it off generally the same way.
5. Dishwasher. Rinse/pre-wash all dishes before loading or just load.

I miss my dishwasher. We don’t have one in this house. When we eventually buy, it will be on the top of the list. But right now I am the dishwasher. I used to rinse a bit for our old one.
6. Breakfast cereal. Cereal in bowl first, then pour on milk or put milk in bowl then add cereal?

People but milk in first? I never even heard of that. Definetly a cereal in the blow first person.
7. Toothpaste. Squeeze from bottom working way up tube as it empties or squeeze from middle or wherever you want?

Squeeze from wherever until it gets down to the last 25% of the tube, then I start to work from the bottom.
8. Condoms. Do you put it on your lover or does he put it on himself?

I used to put them on him. Now more often than not, when we use condoms, I’m too tied up to help. 🙂
9. Condom disposal. In the garbage bin or flush down toilet?

Garbage bin. Sir would have a lot to say about putting latex into the water system.

Bonus: Do you shower in the morning or at night?

I showered in the morning for a number of years. Right now I am showering at night. One reason is my long hair, it gives it a chance to dry without having to damage it with the blow dryer. Also it means that we have  bit more time in the morning. I can just shower after my workout and be good to go.

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: April

There are several unique and weird holidays that take place all over the world. This TMI Tuesday is about the month of April’s special observances. What’s Up April? …

hello-april-months-of-the-year

1. April 1 is April Fool’s Day (All Fools Day), a Western tradition of pulling pranks and hoaxes.
– Did you play any April Fool’s jokes on someone?

Nope.
– Were you the victim of an April’s Fool prank this year?

Not this year.
– What is the best April Fool’s hoax you’ve ever pulled?

I’ve never been good at this. My parents once hoaxed me and my brother by telling us that we were moving…again. There was a lot of screaming, I’m sure they had fun with it.

2. What is your favorite unusual or non-traditional holiday to observe?

A little obvious, but Kinky Christmas is my favorite. We celebrate the dog’s birthday, I don’t know if that is unusual or not. But the kids like it. And it was a great way to teach them gift giving to others.

3. Do you observe any unique local or family tradition holidays? Briefly tell us about this holiday.

Kinky Christmas is really just between Sir and I. But it’s a nice little treat where we get each other a kinky gift. We usually exchange them long before ‘real Christmas’ because we get so excited to play with the toys that we bought.

4. April is National Poetry Month. Share your favorite poem with TMI Tuesday or write a poem and share.
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

-W.H. Auden

5. This month is also Stress Awareness Month. What stresses you on a daily basis?

Kids, Job, Sir’s Job, House we currently live in, House we are trying to buy, Money.

6. April is National Humor Month. Name 3 stand-up comics or comedic actors who make you laugh?

Jim Gaffigan

Zach Galifianakis

John Oliver

7. April 22 is National Jelly Bean Day in the United States, however, it can and should be celebrated all over the world. How will you celebrate Jelly Bean Day?

By respectfully not eating Jelly Beans. By not going near them I will show my hatred and dislike of multi-colored jelly products.

Bonus: The flower for the month of April is the Daisy. How or what do you feel about daisies?

I see them as a whimsical flower. I think of daisy chains. Alice in Wonderland and Little House on the Prairie. Not really feeling them for weddings or special occasions, but I like the whimsy and romance gesture of them.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link totmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

 

Death and Taxes

Welcome to TMI Tuesday. In the U.S. it is tax season, tax reports are due April 15.

There’s Nothing Sexy About Taxes

taxes_tmi

Wherever you are in the world, assuming you all pay taxes–income or other types, answer the following questions.

1. Are taxes levied where you live?

Federal, State, and City. Grump.

2. Do you pay your taxes?

Yep. I mean really, who is going to admit if they don’t pay them?

3. This year will you owe taxes or do you expect a refund?

We actually got a refund from both federal and state. It helped that we had a baby last year. I’m sure next year will be closer.

4. Have you already filed your taxes?

Yep. We have had the same accountant for the last four years. She is amazing. Great price and she is the most professional person. She doesn’t even live on our state anymore

5. You are getting a tax refund, which ONE of these would you most likely do with the money?
a. pay off credit cards
b. contribute to retirement savings
c. go on vacation
d. shop for something (car, clothes, household items, etc)

All over the place with those. We have talked taking a vacation this summer (C), Sir hasn’t really had one since before law school. But we also paid off some credit cards (A) and we did a little shopping (D); we bought a stockpile of diapers and a few fun things on Amazon.

6. Sometimes you just need to have frivolous, and if you get a windfall from a tax refund, which of ONE of these things would you most likely do? Why?
a. have a big party
b. loan it to family or a friend
c. spend a weekend at an adults-only erotic resort
d. gamble (Lottery tickets, casino)

I would love (C). I’m not a gambler and I don’t currently have friends asking for money. I don’t really do parties. I am social, but I tend to get really anxious. I like to plan those events, not necessarily host them. And, if I could get someone to watch the kids, I would really love to go to an event or erotic weekend. Sir and I could really use that. Something with a few classes or play parties.

Bonus: If you could be a circus performer, which act would you be? (I know, soooo random!)

I love to dance. I would say acrobat, but not a tight-rope walker. I would love to be in one of those troupes that swings from fabric and does hand stands on each other. My kids could be clowns.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI: WTH is she Thinking?!

creative brain_tmi

1. You have been asked to organize a sex & kink weekend. Will you be more of a “hands-on” person or more of an “ideas” person?
Can I be both? I’m all about being used for demonstrations. But I am the organizer. So I would try and deal with all the details too.

2. Assuming you are the hands-on type at this weekend sex romp, and you’ve entered a tent to ‘play’ with a male/female couple. Would you like to be given clear instructions before you begin to ‘play’ or do you prefer to be given the general idea of the task and work it out your own way.
I’m a clear instructions gal. Sir would most likely have to give me step-by-step directions. Especially if it includes play with other people.

3. True or False. “During sex, I like to hear and accept feedback.”
Very true. If I’m doing something to hinder Sir’s pleasure, or I could be doing something better. I want to know.

4. What are you wearing right now?
I’m a mom, working from home with two kids. I’m wearing sweat pants and a t-shirt with a comfy warm cardigan. If the kids weren’t here, I would walk around naked. And I’m sure Sir would have me clamped and stuffed and all kinds of gooey. But, for now, my gooey begins and ends with baby food in my hair.

5. I show loyalty to my lover by ________ .
Happily giving him everything that he needs, wants, desires. Or, more realistically, I

6. Do you always have to argue?
Normally, I would say no. But, last night Sir asked me a question and I got defensive. Like, really defensive. I’m not sure where it came it from. Most of the time I’m pretty docile. So, I’ll stick to no right now, with a caveat for my period and randomness that I’m sure Sir will beat out of me.

Bonus: Pick up the closest book to you, open it to page 55. The first line on that page reads: ________ .

Jared nodded with a smile, and she reached in her purse and produced her keys. “Mi casa es su casa”.

When In Doubt, Add Butter by Beth Harbison

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link totmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: St. Patrick’s Day

Happy St. Patrick’s Day

 

Two pints of green beer with shamrocks on them.

1. You found your pot o’ gold. How much is in the pot? What will you do with your gold?
Enough that I could write for a living and Sir wouldn’t have to work. Though I am not sure he needs that much free time :). I would love to travel. Not sure about taking the kids on an international trip again any time soon though. But I have never been west of the Mississippi River and Sir has always felt the need to correct this. And a house, because we need a home base.

2. Some things get better with age, have you? What specifically has gotten better?
Better? I hold down alcohol better. I give blow jobs better (so I’ve been told). I cook better. Coffee had certainly gotten a whole lot better.

3. Are you above average or below average?
At what? Life? I’m sure if I say below average it says something detrimental about my self-esteem. But right now, being sick and tired, I feel below average. I’m sure next week I will be spritely again.

4. What was the last romantic act you did for someone? Did they appreciate it?
I tried to put together a surprise for Sir for Valentine’s day. I was going to book hotel room for us and his mom was going to take the kids. It wasn’t really a surprise in the end, but he did appreciate it.

5. Think back to your very last argument, whose fault was it?
I honestly can’t remember our last argument. It will come to me as soon as I post this. We’ll say it was my fault to cover my ass.

Bonus: I have an overactive _____ .
Imagination. It’s terrible. Don’t get me wrong, coming up with elaborate sex scenarios is wonderful. But it works both ways. I also lay awake at night thinking up awful things that could happen. I have this constant fear of the house catching on fire. And my brain has come up with every conceivable way that could happen.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI: Spring the Season of Love

1. Spring vacation, will you take one? Where?

I already had my spring vacation, I guess. The boys and I went to the United Kingdom for two weeks to visit my parents in Mid-February. I’m not sure that counts as spring though. No real plans for another vacation any time soon though. I would love it if Sir and I could get away somewhere for a few days, but we’ll have to see how his work schedule sorts itself out.

2. Do you become friskier as the temperatures outside heat up?

To a point. When we get to the time of year that the heat doesn’t have to be on all the time and we don’t have to sleep with the covers tucked up under our chins, that will certainly help. But then you hit that temperature where you are just so hot that you don’t want anything to touch you; I’m finding it hard to remember that right now with all the snow outside.

3. Do you flirt more in spring vs. other times of the year?

I would say yes. I pull out the skirts when we get to spring. Long or short, without under ware I tend to get more extroverted with the flirting.

4. Do you dress sexier in the spring?

Again, I would say yes with more skirts. I shave all year for Sir, but when I start wearing dresses I spend a little more time on it. And I think sandals are a lot sexier than boots. That be said, never doubt the sex factor of a pair of fluffy slippers.

5. What day of the week do you have sex most often?

Probably Friday. Sir isn’t worried about getting up the next morning for work, so he’s willing to stay up later to play. 

6. Do you use kissing as an important way to test out a new mate? Good kissers, keep and move forward to another stage in a budding relationship. Bad kissers, get pruned and dumped.

I would say that I do. I haven’t had a very long list of mates, but being a good kisser is definitely a deal breaker. Of course, I will admit, I’m not really the best kisser. I know, I know, quite the hypocrite. I’m not sure why. I don’t think I get my face centered well and I always have to pull back to breathe. And I tend to get distracted really easy. Moving to kissing the neck, chest, or other tasty bits can often force the lips to take a back seat. Something I need to work on as Sir really enjoys a good make-out session.

7. What do you expect from marriage?
a. safety and solidarity and security
b. a journey towards self-fulfillment and self-actualization with a partner that ‘gets’ you.

I think that it is A as we embark on B. Sir and I really do ‘get’ each other for the most part. And he has been exceedingly supportive of everything from my career to me wanting to be his slave. But I don’t think I would have felt comfortable with any of that without a certain about of safety and security in our lives. We still have a lot up in the air, especially as I re-enter the work force, but that balance of solidarity and ‘getting me’ is what makes us work so well.
8. Acts of love & kindness. Which would mean more to you:
a. Taking your partner a cup of tea in bed (or receiving that cup of tea)
b. Giving or receiving a box of chocolates or flowers

I’m a big gift giver. When I see something that Sir (or my mom, or the kids) would really like, I am likely to buy it. Usually nothing expensive, but I do make an effort to be thoughtful about why I think they would like it. However, I would have to go with A on this one. Especially as we have both been sick this last week, the effort and care to prepare and deliver a cup of tea was difficult for me. And I know he appreciated it and recognized the love in the action.
Bonus: In your late teens or early 20s did you take wild spring break vacations with friends? What is the wildest, craziest, sexiest thing you did on a “gone wild” spring break?

No vacations to south Florida for me. My aunt and uncle live in Fort Lauderdale, FL and I kind of got my fill of the place during the calmer parts of the year. I did get quite drunk at a friend’s birthday party while on spring break once. She and her little sister had the same birthday, so earlier in the day the younger had a kid’s party. She had a clown and a bouncy castle. But in the evening, my friend had her party, and they didn’t take the bouncy castle down. So there were several drunk teens (we were in England, so I was legal to drink) jumping around on this kid’s toy. Then, when it got dark, couples paired off into various corners of the castle for make-out and grope sessions. I found myself in a back corner with lovely muscular man for several hours of tonsil hockey fun. Good times.

————
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
Happy TMI Tuesday!