Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Remembering the Good Times

Wow, another great video memory that I can add to my growing collection of personal porn movies. The movies help me remember and feed my hunger during the long absences that, for better worse, define our relationship. We’ve always shared our deepest fantasies and desires. I recall the earliest video moment he shared with me. A very simple solo wanking session in the shower. Simple, but for me that movie always held a special place in the development of our relationship. Its lucky that I live in the digital age otherwise I’d have worn the tape out by now given how many times I’ve revisited that scene.

It was wonderful to see each other again after such a long wait. I love  that we were able to give the gift of ourselves to each other again. There are so many things left on both our lists, but we celebrate and cherish each one as we achieve it as if its the most important thing in the world to us at that point in time. The celebration serves to ensure a re-commitment to our friendship that was forged all those years ago when this type of connection wasn’t possible and keeps it fresh when we are apart. 

Our play that morning started out fairly tame. I was still recovering from the spanking session the night before and we were both a bit worn down. Only seeing each other a few times a year leaves us pouncing on each other from the time we get off the plane until we have a tearful goodbye. After the intensity of the night before, I wasn’t expecting more than a cuddle and maybe some gentle fucking. And that’s how we started off, but as it is often the case we just can’t accept vanilla. We always need to be doing something new, exploring our sexuality and trying things we haven’t been able to with other partners.

I’d taken top position this morning, gently rocking backwards and forwards. Slowly impaling myself deliciously onto his cock with repeated moans. All he had to do was lie there and enjoy it. Well, he did do a bit more and my nipples were thankful for the tongue and teeth action. After a few minutes he whispered in my ear to turn around and ride him reverse cowgirl. He’d always wanted to watch his cock enter my pussy from that angle. He had also mentioned that it provided the perfect platform for some anal fun.

As always, I was happy to oblige. Spinning around quickly I resumed my back and forth rocking action. I heard appreciative sighs and comments from him as I went about my business. I was soon moaning myself as the angle hit my g-spot with precision. Then I felt his hands on my butt cheeks. He started a slow circular motion with his hands, opening my cunt and ass to his gaze.

By this time I was getting aroused and my wetness was dripping down my thighs. He next reached out and scoped up some of the wetness on to his fingers which he then applied to my anus. He went back a few more times and when he felt my ass was lubed enough he slowly inserted a finger into my ass. His pace was maddening slow but I could sense his awe and fascination in what he was doing. After a while he added a finger from his opposite hand. In tandem he used them to pry me open. From his breathing he was clearly enjoying what he was doing. And so was I. My wetness grew as did the urgency of my rocking. A minute later we were slamming into each other, the noise of slapping flesh reverberating around the room.

As our excitement grew, our motions increased in urgency. With a guttural cry he released my ass and grabbed my hips. He pulled me down hard and held me there as he pumped his load of cum into my quivering vagina. I collapsed forward, keeping him inside me. I could feel him slowly softening.

Just before I was going to hop off and swing around for a cuddle I felt him pulling me backwards, wanting me to back up his body. It took me a second to realize what he wanted and when I did I was eager to take this opportunity. I had often spoken about having someone lick their cum from me after they fucked me. As most of my other partners were either dominant or vanilla no one has been inclined to do so. I tried to hold his cum inside of me as I positioned myself with my knees either side of his head. Leaning forward and supporting myself on my arms I positioned my open pussy just above his mouth.

He reached up with both hands and gentle pulled my labia apart. Lifting his head he gave me a quick lick before lying back. Encouraging me to push his cum out of my pussy I strained and pushed as hard as I could. Initially I couldn’t feel anything but after a short while I could feel his cum slowly sliding down my inner labia. His obvious excitement at this was evidenced in his heavy breathing and occasional gasps. The first drip was quite small, but the second one was much larger. He managed to get both drops straight into his mouth. Swallowing deeply I could sense his savoring of the mix of juices and tastes of both of us.

He then set upon my open pussy devouring it like a starving man. He couldn’t get enough of me. Licking and sucking. The occasional finger seeking out any remaining cum. He kept at this for a long while and my excitement grew once more. Sensing this he went at my clit with his tongue. Bring me to a second  and third shuddering orgasm.

After coming down from the climax I  spun around and gave him the biggest, sloppiest kiss I could give. We hugged and cuddled for awhile, but eventually needed some food. Begrudgingly, we rose from the bed and had a soapy handsy shower together.

As I hit the stop button I mused that it would have been good to have captured the shower scene as well. Instead I roll the video back to the beginning and hit play again. Oh well, there is always next time.

California Memories

Rye giving oral sex to Jill
Elusive Anal – ‘Always leave them wanting more’

I got up on my hands and knees as I grabbed the Doxy and Jack grabbed the lube. We had both pumped up the importance of anal as Sir and he had discussed it beforehand. I think he even ripped open the condom as the front door opened. Jill had come home. I’m still not sure about the miscommunication. I think we thought she was going to her hair appointment before heading home. Not that it was a secret what we were doing, obviously, but we still didn’t want to rub it in her face after her long day at work. She didn’t seem to mind, but we both felt bad. We chose to get dressed and keep her company until she left.

In order to have the maximum amount of time all together in the evening, we chose to grab dinner early. I ran through the shower and Jack took me out a group of yummy food trucks.

I cook (food truck dinner) – ‘Don’t worry, I have a cover story.’

Jack had bought lunch. In order to keep things fair I wanted to buy him dinner. I really wanted to get something for Jill too, but she declined. We walked through all the options and came to rest on a cheesesteak truck that he likes. The one I got had roasted garlic and roasted mushrooms on it; it was amazing. We ate next to the lake and talked about passer-bys.

I’ll admit I kept my eye open for someone to recognize us. Well, not me, but Jack. He spoke often of his frustration of having so much local family and struggling to be poly with so much potential judgment. So, I had come up with several cover stories. Several involving being a mom from his daughter’s school. A few also included visiting for my job as a consultant. I’m not sure either would have gone down with his relatives, but I don’t think either of us really cared. Honestly, the possibility of seeing relatives did keep me from touching him as much as I wanted.

After we finished our sandwiches we walked along the man-made lake. I think we talked about he and Jill’s upcoming trip to see their secondary couple. I remember the pang of jealousy. Knowing that I was going to be leaving the following morning made me want to soak up as much as I could. The drive home was quiet.

Going down on Jill – ‘So…Sir wants a video.’

Jill came home looking fantastic. Not that she need to do anything to her hair, but it did look great. I felt comfortable enough to ask for a drink and the other two joined me. It was nice to chat about Jill’s day. We filled her in on the call from Jack’s mom at lunch. The phrase, ‘she bought her more crap’ was mentioned at least twice. We made our way down the hall to the bedroom laughing at all the junk our children seem to collect and how most of it is our parents’ fault.

When we made it to the bedroom, the tension rose. Jack lovingly helped Jill and I undress. I quickly found my way to Jill’s nipples as Jack knelt between her legs. After several orgasms he announced that it was my turn. Sir had asked that I be told to go down on Jill and that video evidence be provided. I was happy to oblige, but felt it completely unfair that Jack got to go first. He knows her body so well. This would be the first time I would ever play with a pussy that wasn’t my own, I needed all the help I could get.

Jill was lovely. I could feel her body relax as massaged her clit. Her folds were so soft and warm. She responded with moans and twitches as I explored her body. She tasted sweet, though having cum so many times for Jack may have been part of this. I rubbed her legs as she began sucking Jack’s cock. I considered fingering her, but as I hadn’t trimmed my nails I decided against it. The last thing I wanted was to hurt or cut her while trying to make her cum.

Jack was watch us and encouraging me. He would react to her twitches with, ‘looks like she liked that’, and ‘you’re going to make her cum if you keep that up’. And, in his all knowing way, he was right. I was almost more proud of making her cum than I was of his four multiples earlier in the day. We curled up to get ready for bed and I felt like quite an accomplished sub. Sir would be so proud of his loan. The only thing that dampened it was that I didn’t want to have to leave the next morning.

Classic train station goodbye – ‘I will see you again.’

Jill had to get up even earlier than normal for work. But she said goodbye before she left. It was so nice to spend time with her. And we decided that on my next visit she would have to take a day off to play. Jack and I curled back up in bed after she left. We both need to have one last connection before I had to leave. It was pretty epic as I recall; another set of sheets to wash. I sipped coffee from a Beauty and the Beast coffee cup (classic!) and packed my last few things into my suitcase. Jack copied all of the 2,000+ photos on my SD card and we wheeled my luggage down to the car.

We drove to the train station, talking and laughing. Pretending that nothing was wrong or off as we pulled into an employee parking space. “We’ll only be here for a bit”. Conversation passed through topics of weekend plans and how we were possibly going to write out the events of the past few days. We completely ignored random passer-bys as we made-out. As the time to leave got closer, we both shared how much we had enjoyed the time. How much we didn’t want to go. He grabbed my leg while we talked; just wanting to keep that closeness as long as possible. He drove me around to the drop-off and helped get my bag out of the trunk. Our kisses and hugs took on this classic 50’s film goodbye for me.

I watched him pull away and half considered chasing after him just for the effect. Though I really wanted one last hug as well. Once I got settled on my way down to L.A. I felt the rush of every emotion over the last days flood my system. All the lovely memories and moments. But mostly, fear. Fear that I would never see him again. Fear that he would forget me and our time together wouldn’t affect him. I’m not sure why I thought that, and I felt bad for even considering that he would treat me that way. But I think I did because of the overarching concern flood my brain. I cared about him. I cared about him a lot. And I wanted him to care about me.

Epilogue – ‘You will never be just some woman I fucked.’

Everything I knew (or thought I knew) about non-monogamy in general led me to believe that love (or strong feelings in general) wasn’t involved. A poly-amorous person would have live-in lovers and be in multiple committed relationships, but I didn’t pull the same definition for non-monogamy. Specifically as it pertained to he and his wife’s arrangement. He likes to fuck. He wants to fuck as many people as possible. And while I certainly don’t judge him for that, that’s not the way I tend to work. My connections run very deep and form very fast. This probably explains why I’ve only slept with six people (including him and his wife). I always saw non-monogamy as a more casual sex arrangement.

I think I just really want him to like me. And I don’t know why, when he says he does, I can’t just take it at face value? I don’t know what I expect. The next day I saw a gift, while shopping with my cousin, that I thought would be perfect for him. I didn’t buy it because I was worried that would be too forward. I think it’s just sheer confusion about how to approach this. We are both married, with young children. We both have jobs, responsibilities, and live on opposite sides of the country.

But I want to see him again. I want to see him again soon. Like suddenly I’m back in a long-distance relationship. But I’m smitten and I don’t know when we might to get to be together again. I’m going to have to go back to work and see friends. And I cannot tell anyone about the portion of my trip that meant the most to me. This experience has been more amazing than I could have imagined.

A Taste of the Lifestyle

“How do you like your eggs Graham? Beth has gotten quite good at poaching in batches lately.” Sir was in a good mood this morning. The blow job I had given him had earned me several ‘good girl’s’ and that was before he got a taste of my hollandaise. He obviously wasn’t too jealous about my cuddling with Graham, though the sly smile plastered on his face often hid multiple meanings.

“They are excellent Sir. It’s been a long time since I’ve had eggs benedict. As amazing as this is, I can’t think now why I don’t make it at home more often. Beth said you were working on an upcoming case, how is it going?”

“Well, thank you. These Subtitle D cases can get really messy – pun intended. But this one is a fairly straight-forward matter. We don’t go to trial for a few months yet, so there’s lots of time to prep.”

I sat listening to the two men. Politics and Pacific Northwest weather just can’t compete with coffee and hollandaise. When we were all finished, I cleared the plates and returned with the coffee pot to pour refills. They were still discussing sports or something when I got back. After a few more minutes of small talk Graham excused himself. By the time he got back from the bathroom things had changed considerably.

As soon as the door closed upstairs Sir had pulled one of the chairs to the center of the room and ordered me strip. His toy bag appeared from the downstairs closet as I knelt in front of the chair. My leash was quickly snapped in place. Sir was obviously going for a dramatic reveal, and I’m pretty sure he got it. Graham’s face as he turned the corner was pretty priceless. I’ll admit I may have smiled a bit as his jaw dropped seeing me kneeling at Sir’s feet with my leash in his hand. I would have been intimidated too.

“Strip Graham and come kneel in front of me as Beth is.” Sir was never one to mince words.

I noticed that Graham hesitated. The look on his face was one of confusion. His reaction would need to be swift or this could have gone south in an instant. Sir was also attuned to Graham’s  hesitation.

“Graham, my instruction was quite clear. I do not like to repeat myself.” Graham hesitated for a split second longer, still processing the scene before him. Then his expression changed ever so slightly; a rye smile appeared. I think it was purely out of a sense of joy. He striped quickly and was soon down next to me. He was trying to hide his smile; at least to start with.

Next, Sir took a blindfold out of the bag and covered my eyes. Whatever he was going to do, I didn’t get to watch. I heard the bag rustle, but he didn’t touch me again. Instead, I listened, on high alert, as he walked away.

“Now Graham, I am going to be testing several implements on you. Your safewords are red and yellow. You will take twenty strikes each. If you cannot handle them, you will use your safeword, however, there will be consequences. Do you have any questions?”

“No, Sir.”

“Excellent. This is lovely little paddle that I designed for Beth for her warm-ups. It’s wooden, but wrapped in a padding to ease the sting. Bend and touch your ankles.” I didn’t hear Graham move, but when the crack as the first strike met his flesh I gathered he had complied. There was no counting out loud from either of them, but I was keeping count in my head. Listening to the impacts I could tell that Sir was moving around Graham’s body. He liked to do that for my warm-ups too. But that padding was almost a curse as it brought a false sense of security that any following tool would shatter. I hope Graham realized that. The twenty hits went quickly.

“That’s bringing the blood to the surface. Now this, this is will break that surface.”

Oh no. Sir was going to push back hard. Maybe he was more jealous than he seemed. The first swing hit and I knew he had chosen the studded paddle. Graham’s hiss in pain told me he wasn’t prepared. His hisses turned to yells after three more strikes. He wasn’t going to make it, I could hardly suffer through five hits with that thing, and I’d had a lot more practice. After four more it happened.

“Red!”

“Eight. Eight is pretty good Graham, but eight isn’t twenty I’m afraid. Kneel.” Graham hissed again as he moved into position. I was so worried about whether Graham was alright that I wasn’t ready when Sir grabbed my arm. “Stand up Beth, it’s your turn.” He pulled me up and bent me over something soft. I think it was one of the children’s toy boxes.

“Since you were unable to take the twenty hits that I require, Graham, now you must watch as Beth takes the rest. She will show you the strength I require and expect from a slave.”

“No, please Sir. I can take more.” As much as Graham was interested in kink and seeing the aftermath of our play, he’d never seen me be actively hit before. It was strange that I was actually more worried about him than I was about the twelve strikes I would have to take for him.

“Silence your begging, you had your chance to impress me. Don’t get mad at me because Beth has to pay for your weakness.” He had hardly finished the sentence before the paddle hit my ass, hard. No warm-up. He either wanted me to hate Graham or make Graham feel really bad for not taking more pain. I was sure it was the latter, but the former was becoming a close second. By the second hit my eyes were watering, by hit number three the tears were flowing. The surprise at besting my previous to-tears record of seven swats was quickly overshadowed by the pain in my ass and thighs. My screams weren’t for show as the last few strikes broke the skin. Nothing deep, but I could feel blood running down the backs of my legs. After the last hit I fell on the floor.

“Get up cunt. You wouldn’t want to get blood on the floor, that would take you hours to clean up. First position.” I rolled up onto my knees and winced as I sat back on my heels. Putting my arms up behind my head stretched my back muscles and I started crying again. The blindfold was soaked with a mixture of sweat and tears. The bag rustled again.

“Bend over Graham. Time for round three. Let’s add a little reminder to your service. What I am putting on you are called ball weights. If you stay in the position I put you, then you will only feel a slight pressure. If you move or struggle, however, the weights will pull to remind you that you are here for my pleasure. Now, since the paddle wasn’t your cup of tea, are you ready to try the cane?”

“Yes, Sir.” His voice didn’t waver.

I heard a few grunts and hisses with the strikes, but Graham took all twenty cane hits. He also took twenty hits from Sir’s flicker whip. As I personally hate that thing, I was quite relieved he had managed to do so well. The bag rustled again and Graham groaned even before I heard a hit. Sir must have pulled out the scary looking whip with the pointy end, I make the same noise when he shows it to me.

“You’ve done pretty well Graham. Most impressive for your first impact session. This piece looks nasty and trust me, it is. Down on your knees.” The first crack made me shudder and Graham cried out. I’m pretty sure he was crying by the second hit. Between the sting of whip and the ball weights pulling, I knew he must have been really hurting. “What, are you going to safeword again? Are you going to make Beth take your pain? I thought you were this big strong sub?” Wails followed the next few strikes. They sounded hard. As much as I wanted him to safeword, I knew Sir would hit me harder just to make Graham suffer. But I wanted Graham to have a good time, I was worried he would think this was my idea. The sixth stroke fell with a resounding,

“Yellow!”

“So Graham, are you happy to let your ‘girlfriend’ make up for your weakness and receive the remaining 14 blows? Cunt, what is your record?”

“9, Sir”, I answered quickly.

“Now Graham, what is it to be? Answer me slave!”

“No Sir, please continue, I can take more.”

I could sense a subtle shift in Sir. He really was pissed off with Graham for the cuddling last night. Oh this wasn’t going to be good.

Unfortunately, I was right. The next blow sounded harsh. The release of air from Graham clearly showed how much pain he was in. I didn’t know how much more he could take.

The eighth blow was even worse. I heard Graham fall to the floor. The sound coming from him was pure agony.

Next I heard between his sobs, “Red!”

I closed my eyes as I felt the grin appear on Sir’s face.

“Only eight Graham, how disappointing. On your knees. Beth will take your suffering for you. Watch her strength in her service to me.” He must have been walking as he talked as his first hit was timed perfectly as he finished with the end of his sentence. The blood from my previous round had dried, but the first lash reopened the cuts. Nine through eleven hurt like hell, but by twelve I think my ass was numb. The tears didn’t stop though. When Sir finally brought down number twenty I was splayed out on the floor weeping.

“Good girl.” He was only gone a moment and I felt a warm towel washing my back and legs. I resisted the urge to curl into a ball while he cleaned me up, every move stung. When he was finished he removed the blindfold and covered me with my aftercare blanket. “You are done for the morning cunt. Here is some water. Now Graham will see what your true service looks like.”

Sir walked over to where Graham knelt. Face filled with guilt at the hits I had taken for him. Not even caring that Sir now stood over him with a look reserved for his most sadistic plans.

“You have both pleased me with your service this morning, but I am not finished just yet. Cunt, nadu!” I tried to rise gracefully, keeping the aftercare blanket around my shoulders, and moved into position off to the side, facing Sir and Graham. It was clear I was going to have to be satisfied with being a voyeur for what was unfolding.

“Now slave, in my negotiations with your Mistress she revealed that you profess to have not found any limits to your service. As your Mistress does not have the desire to test this, she has requested that I do. A challenge that I’m willing to undertake. Now, as we have not negotiated limits and that you are a novice, I’m going to give you continued access to your safewords. If you understand and consent to this scene please respond with ‘yes, Sir”.

Graham took a second and he glanced briefly over to where I was holding position. A very slight nod of my head gave him the necessary courage. He responded, ‘Yes Sir”.

“That’s a good slave. Now kiss my shoe.” I saw Graham look at me before he looked down at Sir’s feet. I mentioned Sir’s love of humiliation play before, but I don’t think I had ever really described it in detail. Graham bent down and the weights on his balls shifted. His kisses were quick and he got back on his knees in position.

“Oh, did that hurt? Maybe you should kiss something a little higher so you don’t have to bend. Here, kiss this.” Sir unzipped his pants and pulled his cock out right next to Graham’s face. I was both scared to watch and captivated by the scene.

“Hannah said you constantly whined about blow jobs, slave. Think those come free? Well, they do for me. Show me your gratitude for allowing you to serve me.”

Graham quickly glanced over to me for reassurance and then back to Sir. Next I heard Graham say very softly,  “Yellow, Sir”.

Sir’s response was quick and laced with scorn,  “So slave, that seems to be your favorite color tonight. You come here professing that you have no limits and at the simplest of requests you balk. I wonder what your Twitter girlfriend thinks of you now!”

The words hit the desired target. Immediately I saw Graham’s resolve change. He didn’t hesitate further. I then watched in fascination as Graham tried to pleasure Sir. His inexperience was evident, but his desire to please was impressive. Sir even moaned a few times. I didn’t know who to watch. This was a perspective of Sir I never got to see; but Graham’s submission was a joy to witness as well.

“So slave, I see you have a taste for this. Well let’s see how talented you really are. Do you recall a conversation we had some time back about mouth gags and deep-throating? No, I thought not. If I recall…, I didn’t tell you to stop, keep sucking slave. Now where was I, ah yes, what I said was that a gag wasn’t necessary, all I had to do was say ‘hold still and open your mouth’. Do you think you can do that?”

I continued to watch, fascinated at how hard Graham tried to deep throat Sir. For a novice he managed to get most of Sir’s cock down his throat, but not all the way. Sir had obviously had had enough and he backed off. Graham sucked in some air in deep breathes, obviously a little distressed. I hoped that Graham was done for awhile.

“Slave, what did your mistress say about penetrating your ass?” Sir’s question was a bit out of left field, but Graham didn’t miss a beat.

He pulled back and replied, “Sir, Mistress said that protection needed to be used to cover anything put in my ass.”

“Cunt, go to my toy bag and retrieve the double jelly dildo and a condom. Bring them to me.”

I quickly got up to retrieve the items and crawled over to Sir. “As requested Sir.” I then resumed a position kneeling close to Sir. I hoped Graham had prepared his ass well, that dildo was on the large size for a beginner.

“So slave, do you think you can handle this?” Sir asked while waving the dildo in front of his face. Graham replied with a simple nod of his head, mouth still full of Sir’s cock.

“Well slave, I’m not really one for imitations, I must prefer the original.”

Sir then withdrew his cock from Graham’s mouth. A line of spit trailed from his cock to Graham’s lower lip. I really wanted to lick that lip. Sir turned slightly towards me. “Cunt, open the condom and roll it onto my cock.”

I looked at Graham so he could see the look of surprise on my face. I didn’t know Sir had planned any of this, I hoped Graham had prepared well. I quickly rolled the condom on Sir’s saliva covered cock.

“Get into position slave. Cunt, you can help him.” I shifted to help Graham move into Sir’s favorite anal position. Ass up, kneeling, face in the carpet. I tried to move the ball weights so they wouldn’t pull with each thrust.

I leaned in as I pushed his arms down. “You are doing great. Just breathe.” He looked at me with a weak smile.

“Back in position cunt, you’ve earned your break. Graham, however, still has more service to give.” He rubbed Graham’s ass for a moment. “Take a deep breath slave, this will hurt.” He almost grinned as he said it.

I tried to watch Graham’s face, his focus on breathing was impressive. And his work with the butt plug seemed to have taken away most of the shock. Sir wasn’t holding back either. Graham did seem to like it at least a little bit, but Sir’s enjoyment was much more vocal. I could never really appreciate his growls with my face smashed into the floor.

I couldn’t settle one whose face to focus on. Eventually all I could look at was Graham’s cock straining against the cage. Soon his face changed and come began to pour out of his dick in slow constant spurts. As Sir came and pulled out Graham collapsed to the side, avoiding the proof of his own pleasure. Sir cleaned himself off and disposed of the condom. Then he grabbed another blanket and a bottle of water. However, rather than handing it to Graham, he held it higher as he stood over him.

“Lick it up, slave.”

Graham swallowed and looked at me.

“What? Do you expect my cunt to clean up after you? Her requirements to keep my floors clean do not extending to your messes. I personal don’t care that were able to get enough stimulation from me fucking your ass for you to be milked. My floors stay clean.”

He looked at me again, then down at the floor. It was significant amount, but he had said it had been awhile since Hannah had allowed him to orgasm in any form. I think he was well aware of that reality as he bent down. Considering the amount, I was surprised that it only took him six licks to get it all up. I was obviously impressed by odd feats.

“Now say thank you, slave.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

“And thank you for your service Graham. Your Mistress will be pleased at how well you preformed.” He covered Graham up with the blanket and placed the water on the floor.

“I’m headed up for a shower, cunt. When I’m done you and Graham can get cleaned up and rest. I will be in my office working for the next few hours. Dinner will be earlier since we did an early brunch, I’ll say six. I’m craving salmon. Since Graham lives so close to the Pacific I’m sure he has a good recipe.”

“Yes, Sir.” He headed up the bathroom and I crawled over to open Graham’s water bottle.

“So he’s just gone? Don’t you get any aftercare?” Graham was sweating, but his breathing had returned to normal.

“Sorry, we didn’t really discuss aftercare needs. This is our usual pattern. He’ll go upstairs and we’ll cuddle and talk tonight. I usually don’t need aftercare for a good six to eight hours. What would you like?” I think my statement took him off guard. He considered my question.

“I don’t know. I would like a shower. But maybe some physical contact would be nice. Sir seemed a bit jealous about last night though, so I don’t want to push.”

“This morning is different though. Service to him is different. We’ll get you clean and comfortable and then we can curl up on the couch and watch a movie. And we’ll have to make a run to the grocery too, to get some salmon. You do have an idea for dinner, right?”

“Got you covered, Mistress.” I smiled.

“Then shower, movie, and dinner it is. I’m really glad you aren’t regretting your visit.”

“I’m not. I said I wanted the full experience. But getting to have a relaxing afternoon with you will be nice too. Think Sir is done with his shower?”

“I don’t hear the water, but you can go peek and see. Maybe he’ll let you join him and you can get some of that physical contact you want.” My sarcastic smile gave me away. “How about we start that movie.”

“Absolutely, Mistress.”

*                          *                              *                          *

This is another installment of a larger erotica piece that started with The Odd Art of Negotiation, followed by Meet and Greet. Graham and Beth’s weekend will continue in the coming weeks.

So this happened…

So because I couldn’t get my nipples pierced this week, Sir decided he wanted to have fun in other ways. Mindfucks are one of those other ways.

Now I’m not going to call myself a genius or anything, but mindfucks with me are generally difficult. I have excellent hearing. And with everything going on, it’s tough to get much past me when I have to have my hands in everything around the house. So he really takes advantage of sensory deprivation in our scenes to mess with me. And the best is when he just lets me dig my own grave.

Which brings me to this:

Rye's pussy covered in clothespins and laced together with twine.
Yeah, my pussy is in there somewhere.

I wasn’t bound or blindfolded. He just put me in my knees and told me he was going to play with me. I heard the box of clothespins rattling. The first few clamps on my outer lips barely registered. I was trying to count them as he put them on. Then I heard the scissors. You really start to pay attention when your pussy is that exposed and you hear scissors. The slight pulling and shifting as he threaded the twine through the clothespins was jarring. All I could think about was that he was creating a zipper. A zipper on my pussy. I couldn’t think about anything else. I was trying to mentally prepare myself for the upcoming pain.

Then this happened:

Rye's pussy covered in clothespins with a Doxy tied to it.
You have trouble focusing too.

I wasn’t ready for the jolt of vibration on the pins. The pull of the twine as the doxy rested against them. My clit was just as confused as my brain was. It wanted to enjoy the feeling of the vibrator, but the pinch of the clothespins made the pleasure take a backseat. And, of course, all my brain could focus on was the upcoming zipper.

Then the vibrations stopped. The doxy pulled the strings as he removed it and it was set aside. This was it, this was went he would pull the string and the zipper would shoot pain through my pussy. But it didn’t. He removed each pin slowly. I could hear laughing at his successful mindfuck. I could barely focus on his subsequent movements. He put the doxy back on my clit as he took my ass. I moaned at the feeling of the pressure with each thrust, but my head was still reeling from zipper that wasn’t.

He’s still pretty proud of himself today. Every once and awhile I see his evil, delightful grin.

…Bastard.

Dirty Dirty Things

I asked to play last night. I wasn’t any more horny than normal, just a little needy. I was proud of myself yesterday. I spent some time in the morning making a list for the week. We have a big family thing this weekend so it’s all hands on deck at my parents. So I plowed through yesterday and I got several things sorted. I think I was feeling like I needed a reward. I know that that isn’t really my call, but I did know Sir would be proud of my good day.

So I didn’t feel too ‘topping from the bottom’ when I requested some fun. The kids went to bed without too much trouble. After our evening ritual of me kneeling and asking where he wants me to sleep, he pulled the doxy out. I wanted to grin, but I’ve learned to reserve my excitement until I know what he’s going to do with it. On the inside I was excited though.

After my June and July tasks of wearing the butt plug for several hours, August and September were a bit of a wash. So Sir ordered me to start getting my ass back in shape for him. I hadn’t even realized how long it had been until he mentioned it. So I have been working to be ready when he wanted to use me like that. Last night he decided I had had enough time.

He gave me a spectacular orgasm with the doxy. My clit was still twitching when he flipped me over. The doxy was buzzing almost too high. But we hit a rhythm that was amazing. Having an orgasm from anal isn’t guaranteed, but Sir has a great track record for helping me enjoy it as much as he does. I was about to cum before Sir was ready so he ‘helpfully’ punched me and brought be back down. He’s so thoughtful.

After making me a happy dirty slave we both curled up. I slept on the bed last night. My hip has been acting weird after sleeping on the floor for a few days. I know, I know, I’m thirty. Writing about a dodgy hip, it’s pathetic.

Anyway, Sir helped me get nice and dirty last night. A great ending to my productive day. Lots to help motivate me to stay on top of my list today. Because nothing motivates like rough anal sex. That’s my new pro-slave tip.

Hitting the Rim

I have tried things since entering the world of BDSM that I didn’t even know existed two years ago. Looking back, my vanilla life was so innocent as it pertains to my sexual knowledge. Who knew the massive education that D/s would provide?

One of the largest areas of new territory (no pun intended) has been toys and activities pertaining to asses. I use the plural in this sense, because this also includes Sir’s ass. One of the first BDSM things we tried was during our switch phase where I would top him. I had a harness and would peg him. He loved it. It was quite the experience for me too. You know, having a penis and all. But that was how I really entered the world of using one’s ass in a sexual way.

As our roles changed and firmly cemented me into the submissive role, our pegging play fell by the wayside. Then it was my turn. This is the first plug that Sir bought for me. To prepare for it and subsequently anal sex, I had to start putting fingers in my ass while in the shower. Something I never in my life thought I would do. But this process has been all about pushing myself. So I eventually upgraded to my pretty glass plug; which recently passed away, and has already been replaced. And after the first awkward experience, we now have anal sex often. My comfort level has grown immensely in the last year.

Recently, Sir has decided to try something new. Over the last month we have been incorporating me giving him rim jobs into our play. Talk about things I never thought I would do.  But it was a lot easier than I thought. And his reaction is always a good motivator. Hearing him moan and appreciate my service is wonderful. It’s not my favorite thing in the world to do. I’d be lying if I tried to go that far. But as far as things that make him happy, it’s a lot easier than taking a beating from the angry red bastard. But it has been an interesting addition. We have been incorporating it slowly, as both of us are getting comfortable with our limits. Just like playing with new sexual positions, we are working through what our bodies with allow us to do. Nothing makes me feel older than trying to get into a position for some sexual play (sex, oral, anal, etc.) and finding that I cannot manage it. But it’s all about experimenting.

There are so many nerves in the ass (just in case you didn’t know). Even just the simple pressure of my tongue can turn him on. I like to think that my tongue has special powers, but nothing proved this like a rim job. I honestly think he enjoys it almost as much as a blow job. Admittedly, I like giving blow jobs more, but I have thing for cock.

As difficult as this process has been as a whole, adding new things has been easy. It’s these little steps forward that keep me realizing that I can do this. I mean, if I can make him moan by licking his ass then I must be doing something right.

Kink of the Week

It’s not cheating

When Sir set my June task to wear my butt plug for 50 hours I was concerned. He didn’t give me the task until the second week of June, so I was worried I wouldn’t have enough time to complete it. And I hadn’t worn the plug for consecutive days for quite some time. I wasn’t sure how multiple hours, several days in a row would work. But that was my challenge. And I think I rose to it. I’m now comfortable wearing the glass plug for extended hours. I’ve left the house with it in to do grocery shopping (one of my 101 Things). It is all together a more pleasant experience to put in and wear. I was doing so well that I finished my 50 hours early and Sir allowed me to start my July hours a few days before the month actually started.

This was a huge relief for me. I was worried about 100 hours in one month. Even wearing it every day for three hours per day wouldn’t be enough. And if I forgot a day or was excused from wearing it because I felt sick would really put me behind. So I started the month with eight hours already done. But yesterday I wasn’t really feeling well. I tried to put it in and just felt sick (sorry if that’s TMI). I didn’t even last fifteen minutes. And then I started (in my usual anxious fashion) to start worrying about how I would make up that time.

Since my little accident with the glass plug Sir ordered me a new one and it arrived yesterday. I like my purple silicone one, but it just doesn’t feel as comfortable for longer amounts of time. So I had been doing my three hours and taking it out. But with the option of the glass plug back on the table, I considered something. What if I slept with it in? I hadn’t really thought about it before. But after I started weighing the options, I’m not sure why it hadn’t been there from the beginning.

So last night was my trial. Sir wanted me to take it out if it kept me up or if I woke up in the night in pain. It would be the longest I ever had it in, so I wasn’t sure. But it wasn’t a problem at all. 9.9 hours and I felt fine in the morning. In fact, it was kind of nice. Having my glass plug again was great. The flange is a lot smaller and smoother than my silicone plug, so moving around at night and sleeping on my back wasn’t a problem. I woke up, took it out and went on my way.

No longer worried about my 100 hours. A few more nights like that and I will be sorted. And, one of my 101 Things goals to wear the plug for 85+ hours in one week is a lot more realistic as well.

Forgiven

Last night was hard, but good. We talked about how I was truly remorseful for my actions. I think he appreciated that. Even though the glitter infraction last weekend was a less important rule, my excuses and back-peddling made it worse. He wants to make sure that punishments are consistent and I want to make sure they don’t happen that often.

But due to the severity of the infraction (coming without permission is big), he pulled out one of his homemade toys. Given the choice I will always ask for his bare hand over one of his paddles. But I am never given that choice.

IMG_0426

 

Don’t trust the plaid padded end, he rarely uses that. I think he added that for show and to make sure the wood end didn’t splinter. He, instead, hits along the entire length of the wood. Often on the edge. I know the red spots look small, but trust me, I earned them. (A) my ass is quite large, those spots just look small compared to the entire surface area. And (B), my pale skin minimizes the marks, something I am quite upset by considering how much Sir likes them.

However, my pain did earn his forgiveness. In fact, he felt so forgiving that my ass was quickly taken. Not quickly as in, he was quick, he was not quick. He was deliciously slow.

But he was generous enough to let me come. And don’t worry, I begged this time.

Popping the Cherry

So I lost my anal virginity last night. Is that a thing? I’m sure it’s not. And those of you that have been doing this for a good decade or so will just laugh at this milestone. But for me, this is a big deal. I’ve been training for a few weeks now. Sir has been pushing me quite hard. We were going to start earlier in December, so I could be ready by 2015, but life happened.

I was just excited that it didn’t hurt as much as I thought. It actually felt pretty good. I don’t know what that says about me. That I was silly enough to think that it would hurt, or smart enough to be happy that it didn’t.
So that was my Friday night. Several orgasms and my first anal intercourse. Hope you all had a nice night too. I’m looking forward to the rest of my weekend. We’re staying in as it is still negative temperatures outside and in the forecast. After a few job applications I am hoping to curl up with a book and some coffee. Baby cuddles and quickies sound like my perfect Saturday afternoon.