Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Elust #86

Elust 86

Elust 86 Header
Photo courtesy of Modesty Ablaze

Welcome to Elust 86

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #86 Start with the rules, come back October 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

On Self-Objectification

Female Orgasms – Addressing Women’s Sexuality

Migraine – A Sexual Spiritual Explanation

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Can You Train a Sub to Orgasm on Command?

Rupert Campbell-Black and me…

 

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Yes I’m a Sexblogger and No I don’t care about your dick

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

BUTTER FOR LUBE… Salted or Unsalted?
KOTW:Static on the line
Control Queen
Well, That Didn’t Go According to Plan

Writing about Writing

A BDSM Vignette from Two Viewpoints

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Sex Negative

Erotic Fiction

The Cure
sports

Erotic Non-Fiction

CORPORAL PUNISHMENT – with a twist
Iris
A Polyquad Squad Orgasm
Beautiful Birthday Fuck
Purpose of Tasks
Do You Trust Me
The meanings of “good girl”

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

How Long Is Enough
The Virgin. Unlocking Feminine Power.
The Other Day
Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!
addressing doubts one step at a time
How D/s has taught me to stick up for myself

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Against All Odds

Poetry

Where I’m From

 

 

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Arousing Control

I threw my neck out on Tuesday. Driving home from work was horrific. By the time I got myself and the kids in the door I could barely walk. Sir walked in the house, took one look at me, and immediately ordered me to drop the boy’s lunch boxes. After a brief description of my pain I was given marching orders.

I had to immediately go upstairs, lay out on the floor, and stay there. I couldn’t take my phone. He called me down for dinner awhile later and that was it. Pain meds and a heat pack were my only companions.

I know that sounds like it should be relaxing. Sir took care of dinner and the kids. Without my phone I couldn’t be bothered by anyone or concerned about work. However, it sort of had the opposite affect. I had nothing to do but fret. Worrying about the fact that I wouldn’t be able to do up a post for the blog. Knowing that laundry is piling up. Finally, I had to pull out the Doxy for its official purpose and try to force my shoulder muscles to relax. It did help.

Eventually I was able to pop my neck and I think get it back in place. Sir gave me some more pain meds to help me sleep. Since I was feeling a bit better he even let me sleep in bed. I had to sleep on my back though. A good night’s sleep did help, but I am still quite sore today.

Sir was in his element though. He came up early on to lay out the rules. After he gave me all my restrictions he admitted to a massive boner. I think he enjoys control more than he lets on. As much as he enjoys it when I cook and give him a break from the kids, I think he likes taking charge. Maybe I just need to be ‘weaker’ so he can swoop in more often. When I think that my mother’s voice starting screaming in my head. There has to be a way to balance it though.

At least, there has to be a way that he can feel comfortable being in control that doesn’t involve me having throbbing back pain.

When What You Wish For Is Amazing

The other night I was tweeting about craving cock. As I have started to get nervous/excited about my sex vacation in a few weeks I have started some serious fantasies. The threesome experience I will be having (hopefully) will be with a married couple, but my fantasies as of late have been largely centered around two men. Sir and the gentleman I will be visiting could be an amazing night of fun. Often, when he and I flirt, we talk about spit roasts and how much I love the idea of being used by two guys at once.

So the other night I was thinking about it and getting all gooey. A few people appreciated my desires and even Sir was thinking fondly on my idea for an evening with friend(s). I had had my Njoy in earlier in the day and that always makes me super horny for the next twelve hours or so. Sir even helped me put it in, which is always leaves me a gooey puddle. By the time we went to bed I was a wet mess.

Sir ordered me to strip and get between his legs. Cock worship started with rubbing my breasts across his cock and balls. Obviously I don’t have the experience myself, but apparently my piercings feel pretty amazing on his shaft. He was breathing heavy after only a few minutes. But, always in command, the orders continued.

“Keep your ass in the air. So that you are ready when he arrives to fuck you. You better be wet for him. You will, right? Because you’re a good girl.”

“Yes, Sir.”

For a split second I honestly thought that someone else might be joining us. I was so excited that I started wiggling my ass from side to side as I began taking him deep.

“You’re dripping for him, aren’t you slut? Get your hand back there. Show him your pussy. Show him how wet you are thinking about him fucking you while you suck on me.”

I was more than happy to oblige. I really was dripping. And my eagerness with my fingers were matched by my tongue. The phantom threesome was working for both of us. With both us teetering on the edge Sir had me stop. He turned me around and slammed into me.

“Suck on your fingers. Taste how went you were thinking of him. Fill your mouth while I fuck you.”

He pounded into me while I sucked the salty brine from my fingers. Neither of us lasted very long, but it was so amazing we didn’t care. Cleaning up we both curled into our post sex positions and relaxed with our post-orgasm glow.

I was just so shocked how well that little bit of role play worked for both of us. A simple fantasy exchange and he really ran with it. Control and the mere idea that someone may join us was a great night for both of us. Sometimes all the kinky pieces fit together and it just works.

Elust #85

Elust 85

Elust 85 header
Photo courtesy of Cheeky Minx

Welcome to Elust 85

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #86 Start with the rules, come back September 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Use
Hot
The Case of the Purloined Panties

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

The Inspection Zone
Date with prey

 

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Voyeur

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Erotic Fiction

Alleyway
After Dark
Night World Flash Fiction
THE PUNISHMENT ROOMS
HELPLESS, BOUND AND SUBJECT – Part 1
Temper temper
How to Start Super Sex
Nobody Comes Looking For Me
it was time to play

Erotic Non-Fiction

Cunnilingus. The Most Special Intimate Kiss
Nastya is nasty
“Do you want to cum in my mouth?” A Memoir
Humiliation: Raylene’s caning 2

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Come as you are…
A Case for Good Men
Changing Labels
10 Commandments of Courteous Casual Sex
The Aftermath
I miss you

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

Formative Kink: “Tanya, the Lotus Eater”
At his feet
Consent In Gorean Culture

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Manicured

 

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Updates on Life

House fireplaceIt’s been a crazy few months, but things are finally settling down around here. We’ve been in the house for almost two months now. The contractors are done and gone. Our kitchen is well and truly lived in, though I try and clear the counters completely at least once a week. My dad is donating his time one day a week this summer to help finish up little projects around the house. It’s been really helpful to finish the trim painting and getting things done. The fireplace he did for us out of barn wood from my great-grandfathers farm is amazing. I can’t decide if it’s out of place in our more modern kitchen or not. Honestly, I don’t really care.

Starting Picture of Rye before diet
Starting Picture

I’ve started the diet and exercise in earnest. My twitter support group, #fwocrew, is amazing. And I’m working with the twitter boyfriend on dieting and counting calories. I’m only down about 15 pounds so far, but in only two months I am pretty happy with it. And the inches I’ve lost on my thighs are noticeable enough in my dress pants too. Hopefully I will get this set as a new lifestyle and get down to my goal weight by next year. It’s not easy. I fucking love ranch dressing.

I started a new job about five weeks ago. I still have my business, but I quit my work from home job. I get out of the house now, and I have nice clothes. It’s a bit crazy. But the work is interesting and I’m learning a lot. It’s not a ton of money, but there is potential there. And I like what I’m doing, so that counts for a lot. Sir and I are both out of the house during the day now, which makes it difficult for everything to be cleaned and neat all the time. But we’re managing.

Rye in BDSM sceneKink is another story. That reads poorly. We’re still enjoying all our kinky fun. It’s a little less consistent, but that’s just life. And we’ll spin it in a positive way and say it’s more spontaneous instead. We have started to make steps towards more of an open marriage relationship. Right now that has only had me playing with one other person (not a wonderful experience), but we’re taking it slow.

I am super excited for my trip in October though. I’ve been in contact (shamelessly flirting) with a guy on twitter for awhile now. So this fall I am flying out to spend two days with him and his wife. Even if it ends up being a fun visit with friends and a mini-break it will still be amazing. However, I am expecting some amazing sex and my first threesome. Great pictures and my first trip to the west coast. It will be fantastic no matter what. After I see them I am taking a coastal train down to L.A. to see my cousin who moved out there last year. She is like a little sister to me and it will be great to see her. There may be a matching tattoo trip as well (pictures might will follow).

So that’s a good all around basic update, right? The house, the job, sex, and upcoming fun. The kids are going to grandma’s tonight, so Sir and are hoping for some play time and a chance to sleep in tomorrow. If I make it to 7am I will call it a win, but Sir says getting up because you want to and not because you have to is the point. And he said it, so it must be true 🙂

ELust #84

Elust #84

Elust 84 header
Photo courtesy of A to sub-Bee

Welcome to Elust #84

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #85 Start with the rules, come back August 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Lightweight
About Those “Apple Thighs”
Why the Hell Haven’t I Rebelled Yet?

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

IDENTITY – hiding the evidence
friday flash–service

 

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Good In Bed

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Erotic Fiction

Ride
Pubic Disturbance
Colds and Lust
Sex Machine
Chemistry
A Dirty Bathroom Floor
Tether
I’m Sorry I’m So Silent
S’il Vous Plaît
Edge of Morning
Dancin’ (Most) of the Night Away
Airport Arrivals

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

42 Kinds of Casual Sex
Living in Fear – An Essay on Male Entitlement
Pride

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

How To Give A Bare Handed Spanking
Reconciling dominance and love
She’s a Very Kinky Gor

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Run the good race
IUD DIARY #1 (1.5 WEEKS LATER)

Erotic Non-Fiction

We Made A Resolution To Make Love Everyday
The 20 Minute Orgasm
More on cunt, corridors & Schroedinger’s cock
Stoned Birthday Sex
Room with a View
I’m Not Done With Your Throat Yet
It’s a strange path to trust.

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Poly and Pets
mono-poly

Writing about Writing

Why Write Erotic Fiction?
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A Day Without Meds

I walked out the door yesterday morning without taking my depression medication. I have done it before.

The morning was good. I really like my job. I feel that my talents and hard work are respected. I have several ongoing projects and my own work space. It’s busy, but very rewarding. My work hours usually pass very quickly. Yesterday was a tad more stressful than normal. We had a few emergencies, but the day ended well. Even getting the kids home wasn’t too crazy.

But the evening took a nose dive I wasn’t prepared for. My twitter boyfriend is going through a tough time. But he started talking about how he dealing with fights with his wife and I forgot that. He was talking about walking away from his kink desires and leaving BDSM go. I got mad. He and I had discussed expanding our relationship and how we felt about each other. He was basically walking away from it. And he didn’t seem bothered by it at all. I don’t want him to fight with his wife, I really don’t. In that moment I just hurt. I wasn’t thinking about logic, I was just being selfish. But I want him to be happy. And I want the chance to see what happiness we could create together.

I shared how much he meant to me recently. How much I cared about him. And I knew he probably didn’t feel the same way. But what I got was “thanks”. I wasn’t ready for ‘thanks’. And ever since then I see him pulling further and further away. And I know he’s dealing with a lot right now. That just makes me feel even worse about everything. He can’t give me what I want from him. And rather than respect it, I just get upset. He’s not doing anything wrong, he’s just trying to be honest. But last night, honesty hurt too much.

My mood just crumbled. All I wanted to do was eat junk food and go to sleep. I didn’t even want sex. And please understand how big that is for me to say. When an orgasm doesn’t even sound good, I’m in a bad place.

So the moral of the story is, I really need to remember to take my meds. Because orgasms are always a good idea.

Slippery Slope

We’ve been trying a D/s dynamic again for hardly four days and I am already mind-fucking myself. Don’t get me wrong, when he does it, it’s hot. But when I do it to myself, it just sucks.

We had an amazing Saturday. An great start to the day with shower together and some afternoon play while the kid’s napped. It was so rejuvenating after an emotional week.

Then Sunday started slow. He had work to do, so he was upstairs for awhile. I had a cleaning list, which I interspersed with my trashy novel and my coffee. We were both productive and the day went fast. But late in the afternoon I found myself getting down. I was a little sad that we hadn’t had any time to play. I think I was just craving an orgasm after a mini withdrawal. I was feeling a little ignored.

After our break, I thought getting back into any form of power exchange would be easy. But last time we were attempting 24/7, this time we are basically just in the bedroom. So I know I shouldn’t be expecting anything throughout the day, but you know me and my stupidity when it comes to expectations. I hate that I am already looking for more control. We haven’t even been going a week. I think this is just one of those things that I need to talk to him about so it doesn’t become an issue again. I cannot self-sabotage.

A lot of reflection and learning from the past. Starting February back in my kinky comfort zone. Just trying to keep perspective and a positive attitude. So I need to give it a chance to evolve and actually let him lead. I never realized how needy I was. Give me an inch and I want a mile.

****

This is from back in the winter of this year. I didn’t edit it or anything. It’s just crazy to think about how much my perspective has changed and yet stayed the same. I still want control, and I’m still needy. But Sir and I have come along way from this. We are talking more and trying to stay realistic with how often we can play. Especially now with me working, a good fuck in the laundry room is amazing.

With a little luck things will keep clicking into place. Maybe we’ll even find a kinky, foodie, board game playing, video game loving friend with benefits who lives close. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming.

When Nights are Rough

I curled into him. He stroked my back and called me a ‘good girl’. My sobs slowed and my nostrils began to clear. I was exhausted. My stomach muscles hurt. My eyes stung. I just wanted to sleep for a week and forget all my poor choices. Forget the pain that I cause myself, because what good did it do me in that moment to blame others.

I reached up to turn the light off and rolled over. I rested my face against this chest. His chest hair was soft and smelled like him. He grabbed my shoulder and pulled me in. My lip began quivering again. I couldn’t cry anymore. I couldn’t possibly have any more tears left. I sighed as they began flowing again. I tried to roll away and he pulled me in closer.

I must have fallen asleep eventually. I wasn’t strong enough to fight his grip.  I woke in the night with dried tears and snot on my face. I sighed at how much my physical appearance probably matched my emotional state. I pulled the blanket up tight under my chin. Trying to let the warmth and softness lull me back to sleep. It didn’t work.