Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.


“It’s not a punishment”.

“How is sleeping in another room, away from you, not a punishment, Sir?” I know the ‘Sir’ was too quippy, but I couldn’t help it. I practically stomped into the guest room.

“It’s not because I say it’s not. You need to get a good night sleep and get over this cold. You will take these meds to help you sleep and then you may actually sleep through the baby.” I swallowed both pills in one gulp of defiance. He tucked me in and turned the humidifier on. “No touching yourself.” He said it as he closed the door, like an afterthought. But as I laid there, waiting for the drugs to help me drift off, it was all I could think about. Damn him for planting the seed.

I’m not sure exactly how he wanted the plan to work, but I don’t think I succeeded. My mom instincts woke me up when the baby cried, even with the meds. The sense of guilt that I was laying in bed and he was up several times with the baby was awful.

And the worst part, is that it didn’t really help all that much. My throat is still scratchy. Stupid germs. And now Sir is at work when he didn’t sleep well all night. I love it when he takes control, but I hate feeling like I could have served him better.

So my mission today is to feel better, come hell or high water. Get things done and never put Sir in the position to kick me out of bed again, even if it is for my own good. Some things are ok to only experience once.

Wicked Wednesday

14 Responses to “Evicted”

  • DelFonte

    I was always the same if P got up in the night for the baby – he’s got to work, I don’t have to, I can drag myself out and do it, really, I can.

    • CollaredMom

      It’s that late night motivation that I always have in the harsh light of the morning.

  • kaya

    Served him better by whose standards, yours or his? 🙂

    • CollaredMom

      What an interesting question? I would have never have thought of it like that. If he thought I wasn’t serving up to his standards, he would correct me. I obviously need to work on letting my own hang ups go. Thanks for making me think about it that way.

  • tori

    Hope you feel better soon, i can imagine it must not have been nice, but its in his best interests to want you well.


    • CollaredMom

      It’s letting go of that control. I want to do it, but it’s still hard. That is a really weird feeling.

  • Marie Rebelle

    Sometimes they know better what is good for us, but our guilty consciences prevent us from doing what they want us to do. I hope you feel better soon!

    Rebel xox

    • CollaredMom

      I obviously still have a lot to learn. Motivation is forcing my health to improve.

  • Jade A. Waters

    Ah! Wishing you well! Definitely couldn’t have felt nice, but good in the big scheme of things…get better soon!

    • CollaredMom

      Thanks. It did help, as much as I wish it hadn’t.

  • Velvet Rose

    Trust Him, He knows you…

    Velvet x

    • CollaredMom

      It’s weird to me how I forget that sometimes. We’ve been together for so long, I don’t understand how I lose that knowledge that he knows me, inside and out.

  • cammies on the floor

    I really like how you are taking care of you to be better to him. I hope you do feel better soon. I have such guilt if I am not capable of taking care of others.

    • CollaredMom

      Thank you. I have a similar problem most of the time. It’s hard when you want to take care of everyone else and you just feel like crap.


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