Chasing Me Chasing You

An uncollared submissive struggling through depression, motherhood, and the constant craving of her next orgasm.

Beautiful Monotony

Monotony can be really boring. I mean, the movie Groundhog Day should have been classified a horror film for most people. And, I am sure, that reading the same thing day after day on this blog would not be entertaining for you.

Some people, however, enjoy monotony in their lives. My mom is perfectly happy to eat the same thing for breakfast and lunch everyday. My son can watch the same movie on repeat. I, too, like the routine of my morning and the quiet of my blog and work time each day. To some it’s monotonous, to me it’s bliss.

Last night, I was kneeling on my little bed on the floor. Sir and I were talking about our day and our goals for tomorrow (today). And I was thinking about what to write about. I usually try to plan out some posts for the week, but with the odd, emotional weekend at my parents, I didn’t have time. So I’m playing a little catch up. But I was talking to Sir and I realized how normal it felt. Sleeping on the floor. Kneeling at his feet. It was comfortable. And, in many ways, monotonous. I get out of the shower, I go to my bed and kneel in position until told to speak. And I think the break from the routine is really what threw me off this weekend.

Monotony of this dynamic is actually beautiful. I know what he expects of me (at least here I do). There is so much comfort in that. Before (I always talk about our life before D/s as if it was a lifetime ago; because it feels that way), our nighttime was always awkward. I wasn’t sure if he wanted me to make the first move. Or if he was tired and just wanted to sleep. There were always questions about sex and talking and even whether or not to cuddle. Now I have a place. No matter what I always return to my bed; and he will let me know what he needs from me.

Monotony feels so good.


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